1. Describe your problem:

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2. Now, describe your problem accurately:

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3. Speculate wildly about the cause of the problem:

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4. Problem Severity:

A. __ Minor

B. __ Minor

C. __ Minor

D. __ Trivial

5. Nature of the problem:

A. __ Locked Up

B. __ Frozen

C. __ Hung

D. __ Shot

6. Is your computer plugged in? Yes__ No__

7. Is it turned on? Yes__ No__

8. Have you tried to fix it yourself? Yes__ No__

9. Did you make it worse? Yes__

10. Have you read the manual? Yes__ No__

11. Are you sure you've read the manual? Yes__ No__

12. Are you absolutely certain you've read the manual? No__

13. Do you think you understood it? Yes__ No__

14. If `Yes' then why can't you fix the problem yourself?

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15. How tall are you? Are you above this line?

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16. What were you doing with your computer at the time the problem occurred?

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17. If `nothing' explain why you even need a computer.

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18. Are you sure you aren't imagining the problem? Yes__ No__

19. How does this problem make you feel?

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20. Tell me about your childhood.

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21. Do you have any independent witnesses of the problem?    Yes__  No__

22. Can't you do something else, instead of bothering me? Yes__